How i have changed in the past two years…

Before you proceed you might want to check this out …

Change. I have to admit i am one of those people who are really scared of it. I like to think of myself as spontaneous and all that but it is usually within my reach, i don’t do well with drastic change. I like routine, i like knowing exactly what is happening and i like things to stay put. Looking back two years ago (powered by this post) i realise that i have gone through a whole lot of changes than i cared to notice. 2015 was another life man you have no idea, let me break down the changes for you:

2015 was my year of alcohol, i drank, all i did was drank. I drank it all. I went out with my friends, i travelled around my country. I was working at that time and my salary was just for alcohol, travel and food. Those were good times. Now, i rarely drink and its probably because i moved to India in dry state were you can’t just walk up to a shop and buy alcohol. There are no clubs (in this state) therefore we buy alcohol and just do drink ups at home or in the car and what’s the fun in that huh? 2017 i have labelled as the year of fitness. As we know alcohol and fitness are not the best of friends so we drink in moderation. Oh also i think i have droped 20kgs from the 2015 me yea b snatch that im all kinds of yummy now. Literally a snack 😂🙈

Another change i have undergone is i am celibate now. Those who know me know that i am a very sexually liberal person and i am not shy with details. But somehow this year i found myself being more stingy with myself (ndega ndonaka). I just find it hard for me to give away the most part of myself to just anyone njee not that that is what i used to do. See, i am a one flavour kind of girl if you are my chocolate chip ima chow you into oblivion, you wont ever see me in the strawberry aisle. Its hard to jump from one partner to the other after falling out so i decided to date without the sex. Oh yes you guessed it niggas are so not down for that, so thats probably it im the fine line between celibacy and drought. Oh i have also noticed that if i haven’t done the deed i move on faster than the flash. Issa bonus. In 2015 i was in a “serious”relationship 😊….

In 2015 i was at a dead end job, a british claims call centre, with no idea what my next step was. I barely thought about it. I was content, probably because i was grateful to actually have a job at all. However i am happy to report that 2017 sees me a focused young woman pursing a public health career praise God halleluyah.

2017 has seen me getting real close with my mom, back then i would forget to text her. But with the distance between us the heart has grown fonder. I see her clearly now, she is made from nothing but pure gold 😍

My hair has gone through changes as well, i now keep my hair natural no weaves no braids no dreadlocks just my uncombed blonde hair. Whoever lied to me than i can rock any hairstyle and still queen did yall a disservice.

That’s it till the next post 😉

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Weird things i do when i am alone

You might want to read this before you proceed 😊🤗

  1. The first thing i do whenever i am left alone is to take off my clothes and just walk around naked. It is liberating, the highest form of independence. If its not possible to take off my clothes i take off something, one item of clothing a hat, a shoe…something!
  2. I examine my boobs for cancer or in other words i feel myself up. At times it doesn’t end there, i examine other parts of my anatomy too 🤔
  3. I speak to myself while in the loo. A full blown dialogue of situations, create scenarios that have never happened and are not even remotely affiliated with anything i may have seen or heard. I could be writing scripts in the bathroom and be next Shonda, i am really sitting on a talent.
  4. I sniff myself to sleep. My shower gel is to blame for this, i be just lying there smelling like fresh angel tears, forbiden fruits and paradise and i can’t help but sniff myself after every 3 seconds and take a small nibble at me at times. Yea i deserve nice things, do not look at me like that!
  5. I don’t answer the door, i sit still and pretend i am not home  because peopling is taxing.
  6. I dance in the mirror and do full blown karaokes, in other words i turn up!! Sing out loud till my voice quivers and let out my crazy-should-never-be-seen dances and sometimes records them.
  7. Open the fridge a thousand times and hope my fave food just magically appears
  8. My hands are always in my panties or on my boob, they are my safe places + they are comfortable. I do remember to wash my hands tho whenever i become aware of what i am doing (sometimes)

Well thats probably it for now, i am sure there is more stuff that i have just forgotten these can’t be the only other grossly weird habits i have. Will update when i think of my extra solo habits!
P.S Feel free to drop your own weird habits in the comment section this is a safe place 

30 Day Blog challenge

So i haven’t been writing much these days its either laziness, writer’s block or just one of those things were maybe i have realised that im only a good writer when i am in love or seriously heartbroken. But thats gotta change so i am doing this 30 day blog challenge to jumpstart my writing skills again. Enjoy 💋

Whose babies are these anyway (5)

Read chapters 1 2 3 and 4 if you haven't already…

I feel kind of guilty for telling Tanya about Hazel and she left, leaving the kids with that girl. Who does that? What was she thinking? Was this her way of dealing with things? Who was she trying to fix? Whose babies are these anyway. 

Ever since she went awol last week i have been taking care of the kids, her phone is unreachable, her husband is going from family to family trying to locate her to no avail. Poor Jonathan…smh did i just say poor Jonathan? That is just unfair. Poor Tanya. In fact so poor as it is after being cheated on she is going to be labelled a bad mother for dumping her kids at the side kick's. When the family meeting is called she is going to receive backlash and be told to act straight because she is not the first woman to have her husband step out. Her parents will probably tell her to go back to her husband and stop embarrasing them which is why she didn't go to them. I should have kept my big mouth shut but instead i just had to create a mess.

Arrrgh!

The car pulls in the driveway, another unfruitful day of looking for her is the look on Jonathan's face. I know he is now fearing for the worst, what if ahe went and did something stupid and killed herself? I am only here for the kids, i cant be making him feel better not after what he did to my cousin. He walks past me and goes to bed, again he has skipped his dinner and he won't look at his kids i am worried.

Let me try to call Tanya again maybe by some chance…..oh God it rings! Somebody picks up 

Me: Hello

Silence…….

Me: Tanya, don't hang up. Just tell me were you are please and if you are safe.

Silence……….

Me: We are all worried, he misses you and the children need you please come back home sis.

Her: Do not ever call me again.

The phone is dead.

How can she be so heartless? Women never dump their children, in fact they usually stay for their children. I do not know what to do, what did i get myself into? What do i do? Whose babies are these anyway?

Nuts about nuts

I had never had a coconut, but well i had the liberty of tasting one quite recently. Horrible! I mean the amount of energy i used to remove its extra hairs, take out the droplets of coconut water, break the shell only to get to the flesh and it wasn’t what i anticipated ha! 

I did learn a thing or two tho in the process. One of them was i am more patient than i thought I was. I mean i had a whole set goal, the nut (i am nuts about nuts but thats a story for another day). I have recently started ising coconut oil in my cooking and while it was nice at first just imagine your stew smelling like tennis biscuits. Very unbecoming. I appreciate the benefits it has on the skin, the kilojoules etc but lets face it coconuts suck! There i said it.

 Now i was wondering why i just started writing about coconuts after taking a whole amount of time off, i think i now know the reason why. That is my unpopular opinion, thank you for listening 😊. God bless you